tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7061988432845829428.post7285593793125332817..comments2023-04-02T13:24:40.532+00:00Comments on Marion Honey: Thoughts on love.Marionhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12196400134827560612noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7061988432845829428.post-36322603914294459032012-10-29T06:15:12.599+00:002012-10-29T06:15:12.599+00:00Ok, so I followed a link in your latest video'...Ok, so I followed a link in your latest video's description and I ended up here and this is too good not to reply to.<br /><br /><br />I think there are a myriad of different types of love. At its base form it could be a connection to a cherished object, or to an idea. Many Philosophers have said that love as a concept is the definition and source of the true human virtues e.g. selflessness, compassion, and the list of loves goes on.<br />I guess the difficulty with expressing Actual Love (As you so handily put it) is that it's such a very, very personal thing. It's like presenting your heart on a platter to someone, be it friend or family, and the feeling of risk connected to having that rejected or unreciprocated in anyway (No matter how likely or unlikely that may be) is a devastating concept. Not just in the sense that the love wouldn't be returned, but also in the sense that in the event of it happening this person or people may be driven away or made uncomfortable by the act, and that's the total opposite of your intent. (It's about 20 to 6am, you may need to be lenient when analysing my point-making)<br /><br />In the 19th century, it was in a sense, a larger world. Each person had their social groups and their families and a person's dependence on this solid bedrock of connections was one that was often lifelong. I think it would have been easier to demonstrate love then, when the people you met and got to know would very likely be the people you still know 20 or 30 years later. Today it's a very connected and comparatively small world which is (Somewhat oxymoronically) also focused on the development of independence. It's a possibility that we as people find it hard to say "I love you" to our families because we on some level wish to show them that we're independent and sure footed and want to do them proud. For our friends I think it's a lot harder now to establish a bond that can develop in to Actual Love. The people you meet in Secondary School will most likely not end up in the same college as you, or the very short time you had at college (The English college that is, not uni. College is only 2 years long) was not long enough to make friendships concrete. For the friends we truly hold close that focus on independence I mentioned often means it's a lot harder to share things with people in general in case you burden them with your thoughts, and if it's difficult to share those small things and be just that little bit vulnerable with the people we hold dearest it's a very difficult and daunting prospect to share those things that leave us very vulnerable, even if it's just to express how much a person means to you.<br /><br />Ok, so now it's about 5 past 6 I'm going to stop writing. I'm sure I could say more but sleep. Feel free to call me out on any of this, I was just theorising. It was sort of a stream of consciousness typathon whilst what you said in dat_blog above was fresh in my brain.<br /><br /><br />That James person <br /><br /><br /><br />Jommuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15781404129393916734noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7061988432845829428.post-30542497004101783542012-10-28T02:56:02.340+00:002012-10-28T02:56:02.340+00:00I'm not really sure what to think about this w...I'm not really sure what to think about this whole love thing either, to be honest. Even with being in a relationship with someone who is my best friend and who I'd want to be committed to forever. But sometimes I wonder what the heck love is when I see posts on Tumblr claiming your in love when you feel like this or do this or that or whatever...<br /><br />Maybe I just need to watch more old movies and figure this out. xDAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7061988432845829428.post-61061317883147218932012-10-26T22:35:41.321+00:002012-10-26T22:35:41.321+00:00Thanks very much for this--such a great response!Thanks very much for this--such a great response!Marionhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12196400134827560612noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7061988432845829428.post-8807722168693703012012-10-25T23:05:38.990+00:002012-10-25T23:05:38.990+00:00Okay, so it's 1am here and I'm pretty tire...Okay, so it's 1am here and I'm pretty tired, but my sleepy head now doesn't want to stop thinking about this blog post. <br /><br />Thinking about the more traditional families and earlier marriages, I think telling someone you loved them just had to do with a lot more commitment a few centuries ago. Maybe I am idealising this and imagining families in the early 20th century in a way they really were in maybe, the 19th century. But I think back then (as if I'd lived during that time...),, when you loved someone, it really had to do something with spending your whole life with this person.<br /><br />Whereas now with all these more superficial acquaintances and facebook friendships, the use of the world love has quite obviously been adapted to that change. And I think, as soon as we start questioning that and think about the real value of it again, you can't help but to be intimidated. <br /><br />And I guess, some people will also find that too nostalgic and are fine with the way we superficially use the word love. They probably even make up the majority of the society right now and that's why you start feeling like an idiot when you actually think about using the word 'love' properly. Like, telling your best friends and parents you love them. (Which I haven't done for ages either. I only ever write "love" at the end of messages, but never actually "I love you". But I am honestly too sleepy to start questioning that as well - time to go to bed.) <br /><br />Actually, I don't know either. Kathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07138354803194538335noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7061988432845829428.post-58792106480588690642012-10-25T22:33:27.376+00:002012-10-25T22:33:27.376+00:00Everything you just wrote, I've thought about ...Everything you just wrote, I've thought about and asked myself in the past. I think everyone must feel this way at some point in time though. Maybe some people have had more experience with expressing and feeling love and that's why they're so candid with the word. Nataliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06466955878741447824noreply@blogger.com